Paraguay Asks: "Who the Baby Daddy--Times 3!"

I just find this interesting on a number of levels. Paraguay's President Fernando Lugo is apparently quite the ladies man and can't keep his pantalones zipped! He's now being accused of fathering a 3rd illegitimate child. That's right--three. I can't find anything that says Lugo is married but--he was a Roman Catholic priest!

He resigned his priestly duties in 2004 and then turned to politics. With that vow of chastity no longer an issue, I guess Lugo felt he had to make up for lost time! It's kind of sad, really, since his election was a watershed of sorts for Paraguay, being that Lugo was a former priest, a liberal and outside the entrenched power structure of the country.

And we thought Bill Clinton was a horndog! Of course, can someone say, "Contraception!?"

Paraguay Asks: "Who the Baby Daddy--Times 3!"

I just find this interesting on a number of levels. Paraguay's President Fernando Lugo is apparently quite the ladies man and can't keep his pantalones zipped! He's now being accused of fathering a 3rd illegitimate child. That's right--three. I can't find anything that says Lugo is married but--he was a Roman Catholic priest!

He resigned his priestly duties in 2004 and then turned to politics. With that vow of chastity no longer an issue, I guess Lugo felt he had to make up for lost time! It's kind of sad, really, since his election was a watershed of sorts for Paraguay, being that Lugo was a former priest, a liberal and outside the entrenched power structure of the country.

And we thought Bill Clinton was a horndog! Of course, can someone say, "Contraception!?"

Has Anyone Seen My Dildo?!

If your sensibilities are just too delicate, well, read no further. But I have a dilemma.

My partner is going out of town to see his family for the holidays, which means I'll have 2 ENTIRE DAYS to myself! Sweet Lord in Heaven, I cannot wait. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want, eat whatever, stay up late. Hmmm, maybe I'll just stay inside and masturbate all day!

Hey--don't judge. It's been a rough year since his stroke, and besides, a guy's got to get action somehow!

So I went looking for the dildo ... just in case. And it's nowhere to be found! Truth be told, it hasn't seen the light of day in a while, and I don't really even remember where we put it. I do know it was somewhere "safe" so that no one would inadvertently discover it. I looked in all the usual places, but now I'm worried.

Judge if you will, but geez, I had plans! And now I'm afraid it will unexpectedly roll out of the china cabinet during Thanksgiving! I'll be sure to post if that happens.

Has Anyone Seen My Dildo?!

If your sensibilities are just too delicate, well, read no further. But I have a dilemma.

My partner is going out of town to see his family for the holidays, which means I'll have 2 ENTIRE DAYS to myself! Sweet Lord in Heaven, I cannot wait. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want, eat whatever, stay up late. Hmmm, maybe I'll just stay inside and masturbate all day!

Hey--don't judge. It's been a rough year since his stroke, and besides, a guy's got to get action somehow!

So I went looking for the dildo ... just in case. And it's nowhere to be found! Truth be told, it hasn't seen the light of day in a while, and I don't really even remember where we put it. I do know it was somewhere "safe" so that no one would inadvertently discover it. I looked in all the usual places, but now I'm worried.

Judge if you will, but geez, I had plans! And now I'm afraid it will unexpectedly roll out of the china cabinet during Thanksgiving! I'll be sure to post if that happens.

Can Shamanism Help Your Sex Life?

(both "Desert Shaman" photos by Greg Day)

I haven't posted about any shamanic work lately. No workshop this month, or for the next 2, but I have conducted a few solo journeys. But nothing too dramatic or insightful to report. I'm attempting to journey more frequently and explore this path more deeply, however. Some may consider what I do crazy, but I'm always at peace after a journey and, in general, these experiences allow me to explore parts of my spirit that are too often neglected.

Made time for 2 journeys this weekend, and I wanted to experiment and see what would occur if I journeyed with a specific goal in mind. The last couple of journeys were a bit frustrating since my mind kept wandering and not much "happened." So, here's where the sex comes in. My partner and I still haven't been intimate in a long while. We were going to couple's counseling, but we've had to put that on hold for financial reasons. So there's been some discussion about sex but not enough to make any difference.

And the lack of sex is becoming a real problem. At this point, I'm open to any solution, but my partner doesn't seem all that concerned either way. I know there are any number of ways to handle this in the real world--but I wanted to see what insights I might get on a shamanic journey. Why not? I wanted to see what my subconscious would cough up, what images and metaphors might tumble out if I could trick my everyday defenses.

In order to do so, I decided to conduct a Lowerworld journey and work there with my spirit guides Wolf and Vulture. Hopefully they would guide me to some insights.

I won't give too many details about the journeys themselves since they were quite similar and relatively short. I followed my usual approach, a drumming CD playing with me lying on the floor of a dark room. I began the journey by entering the woods here at my home and going to the Circle in the Grove. There's a fallen tree nearby, and some small animal has dug out a burrow there. So I kneel down and shimmy inside.

The Lowerworld landscape is familiar: lush, green hills barren of trees but shrouded in fog and marked here and there with large rocks and boulders. Very much like the photo here, of Ireland (photo below by Donncha Caoimh).

My first journey was a little freaky kinky at first. As soon as I emerged, I began to shift into wolf form, and then my spirit wolf appeared nearby from among some trees. We approached each other and began to circle and sniff--as if we were about to have wild wolf sex! But wait a minute, I thought, is this "supposed" to be happening? Am I doing this right? And, whoa, is this bestiality?

Well, I never got to find out because my partner interrupted by knocking on the door and asking for something.

First Lesson: I need to politely ask him not to knock if the door's closed and remind him that it is frustrating when these sessions get interrupted like that. But I also learned that I could have simply ignored his knock. Instead I opened the door and acted like nothing was wrong. Why? Because I'm insecure of what he thinks about my shamanic work. I'm also fearful of what he would say if I explained it all in great detail. And I was also afraid of an argument. It's obvious that I do need to ask more for what I need, whether that's time to journey uninterrupted--or sex. I know this, of course, but to ask for sex doesn't necessarily lead to it. Yet I can certainly ask more. If nothing else, it would force this issue more out into the open.

Which is where it needs to be. Our relationship won't last much longer if we keep sweeping all these sexual issues under the rug.

Fortunately on the second journey, I wasn't interrupted. I had plenty of time in the morning before he woke up. As I entered the Lowerworld, however, I sensed great impatience within. This time I didn't shapeshift but sat quietly the ground. Wolf approached silently and sat, and Vulture also flew down to land on a nearby boulder. All was silent, yet I shared with them my spiritual and emotional fatigue. This weary shaman needed strength.

Then it occurred to me to dance. Wolf and Vulture moved back, and I rose and began to engage in the coolest, wildest dance. I stomped and spun, and I could see I was wearing some sort of arm bands and anklets made of long strands of grass. I wore one around my neck, too. I was naked (as usual) except for some sort of grassy covering around my waist.

Best of all were the emotions. If felt great to extend my body in this way, to follow the CD drumbeat, to bend and stretch and move. As I danced, Wolf and Vulture moved around me clockwise in a circle. I felt free as I danced, not ashamed of my body or of exposing it. I felt strong and handsome and sexual.

And then it was time to end. Second Lesson: I somehow need to find confidence in myself sexually, physically, emotionally. Oh sure, piece of cake. I know these lessons and experiences are all telling me what I already know, but it's good to have this affirmed in a roundabout way, when I'm not expecting it or necessarily even thinking about them.

So how do I build sexual confidence and strength? I mean, it's kind of embarrassing to even ask that question. Our society tells us we're supposed to know it all, right? Sex is such a powerful force and most of us are so lacking in how to use it well and wisely. I don't want this sexual frustration to win. I want to channel that energy to make things better somehow, if possible. It sounds odd to admit, but I need to work on my sexuality. And no, I can't afford any fancy workshops or counseling. Instead, I'm going to have dig deep inside and see what I'm made of, on my own, at least to start.

Has anyone else out there done any sexual work like this or found a particularly spiritual approach to handling sexual energy?

Can Shamanism Help Your Sex Life?

(both "Desert Shaman" photos by Greg Day)

I haven't posted about any shamanic work lately. No workshop this month, or for the next 2, but I have conducted a few solo journeys. But nothing too dramatic or insightful to report. I'm attempting to journey more frequently and explore this path more deeply, however. Some may consider what I do crazy, but I'm always at peace after a journey and, in general, these experiences allow me to explore parts of my spirit that are too often neglected.

Made time for 2 journeys this weekend, and I wanted to experiment and see what would occur if I journeyed with a specific goal in mind. The last couple of journeys were a bit frustrating since my mind kept wandering and not much "happened." So, here's where the sex comes in. My partner and I still haven't been intimate in a long while. We were going to couple's counseling, but we've had to put that on hold for financial reasons. So there's been some discussion about sex but not enough to make any difference.

And the lack of sex is becoming a real problem. At this point, I'm open to any solution, but my partner doesn't seem all that concerned either way. I know there are any number of ways to handle this in the real world--but I wanted to see what insights I might get on a shamanic journey. Why not? I wanted to see what my subconscious would cough up, what images and metaphors might tumble out if I could trick my everyday defenses.

In order to do so, I decided to conduct a Lowerworld journey and work there with my spirit guides Wolf and Vulture. Hopefully they would guide me to some insights.

I won't give too many details about the journeys themselves since they were quite similar and relatively short. I followed my usual approach, a drumming CD playing with me lying on the floor of a dark room. I began the journey by entering the woods here at my home and going to the Circle in the Grove. There's a fallen tree nearby, and some small animal has dug out a burrow there. So I kneel down and shimmy inside.

The Lowerworld landscape is familiar: lush, green hills barren of trees but shrouded in fog and marked here and there with large rocks and boulders. Very much like the photo here, of Ireland (photo below by Donncha Caoimh).

My first journey was a little freaky kinky at first. As soon as I emerged, I began to shift into wolf form, and then my spirit wolf appeared nearby from among some trees. We approached each other and began to circle and sniff--as if we were about to have wild wolf sex! But wait a minute, I thought, is this "supposed" to be happening? Am I doing this right? And, whoa, is this bestiality?

Well, I never got to find out because my partner interrupted by knocking on the door and asking for something.

First Lesson: I need to politely ask him not to knock if the door's closed and remind him that it is frustrating when these sessions get interrupted like that. But I also learned that I could have simply ignored his knock. Instead I opened the door and acted like nothing was wrong. Why? Because I'm insecure of what he thinks about my shamanic work. I'm also fearful of what he would say if I explained it all in great detail. And I was also afraid of an argument. It's obvious that I do need to ask more for what I need, whether that's time to journey uninterrupted--or sex. I know this, of course, but to ask for sex doesn't necessarily lead to it. Yet I can certainly ask more. If nothing else, it would force this issue more out into the open.

Which is where it needs to be. Our relationship won't last much longer if we keep sweeping all these sexual issues under the rug.

Fortunately on the second journey, I wasn't interrupted. I had plenty of time in the morning before he woke up. As I entered the Lowerworld, however, I sensed great impatience within. This time I didn't shapeshift but sat quietly the ground. Wolf approached silently and sat, and Vulture also flew down to land on a nearby boulder. All was silent, yet I shared with them my spiritual and emotional fatigue. This weary shaman needed strength.

Then it occurred to me to dance. Wolf and Vulture moved back, and I rose and began to engage in the coolest, wildest dance. I stomped and spun, and I could see I was wearing some sort of arm bands and anklets made of long strands of grass. I wore one around my neck, too. I was naked (as usual) except for some sort of grassy covering around my waist.

Best of all were the emotions. If felt great to extend my body in this way, to follow the CD drumbeat, to bend and stretch and move. As I danced, Wolf and Vulture moved around me clockwise in a circle. I felt free as I danced, not ashamed of my body or of exposing it. I felt strong and handsome and sexual.

And then it was time to end. Second Lesson: I somehow need to find confidence in myself sexually, physically, emotionally. Oh sure, piece of cake. I know these lessons and experiences are all telling me what I already know, but it's good to have this affirmed in a roundabout way, when I'm not expecting it or necessarily even thinking about them.

So how do I build sexual confidence and strength? I mean, it's kind of embarrassing to even ask that question. Our society tells us we're supposed to know it all, right? Sex is such a powerful force and most of us are so lacking in how to use it well and wisely. I don't want this sexual frustration to win. I want to channel that energy to make things better somehow, if possible. It sounds odd to admit, but I need to work on my sexuality. And no, I can't afford any fancy workshops or counseling. Instead, I'm going to have dig deep inside and see what I'm made of, on my own, at least to start.

Has anyone else out there done any sexual work like this or found a particularly spiritual approach to handling sexual energy?

Ms. Mary Moodswing

I was in such a shitty mood on my way into the office today, and I'm trying to figure out why. Ever have those mornings where you just want to plow through all the other cars? No? Ok, so maybe I have a problem. But I'm usually so laid back, honestly.

Haven't posted anything lately on how the couples counseling is going, and I think this is part of what's bothering me. The counseling seems to be helping, but I think it's going too slow. Maybe we need to get a new therapist, but heavens to murgatroid, I don't want to start over again! The good news is that my partner and I aren't fighting as much, and we've had a couple of nice moments lately.

Yep--a couple....of....nice....moments. So is that it? Am I supposed to be happy with that for the next 30-40 years? I think this is what has me angry. He's trying, in his own way, to make things better--but I just don't think it's going to be enough.

I want more passion, more affection in our relationship. I want not to be turned away when I try to get a bit closer. Hell, I want to have sex! I guess I'm angry because I keep hoping things going to significantly improve--and they're not. There's just too much to dig through, and honey, therapy is expensive. I might give this til the end of the year and then re-evaluate. A year of therapy seems plenty to me.

So, feeling angry, desperate, bored and quite horny--a dangerous combo!

Add guilty, too, for even posting this. I don't know why I'm in this situation or why it seems so difficult to change. My friends say it's because I really care what happens, that I still care about my partner and our relationship. Makes sense.

But it also feels like I'm waiting for something, something either positive or negative, to happen that will tip the scales one way or the other. Maybe that's what I'm doing wrong. This morning, I pulled a tarot card for a quick meditation: the 7 of Pentacles. I'm still learning tarot, but this seemed to be about taking responsibility for my actions as well as coming to a cross-roads and taking stock. Seems appropriate, no?

Ms. Mary Moodswing

I was in such a shitty mood on my way into the office today, and I'm trying to figure out why. Ever have those mornings where you just want to plow through all the other cars? No? Ok, so maybe I have a problem. But I'm usually so laid back, honestly.

Haven't posted anything lately on how the couples counseling is going, and I think this is part of what's bothering me. The counseling seems to be helping, but I think it's going too slow. Maybe we need to get a new therapist, but heavens to murgatroid, I don't want to start over again! The good news is that my partner and I aren't fighting as much, and we've had a couple of nice moments lately.

Yep--a couple....of....nice....moments. So is that it? Am I supposed to be happy with that for the next 30-40 years? I think this is what has me angry. He's trying, in his own way, to make things better--but I just don't think it's going to be enough.

I want more passion, more affection in our relationship. I want not to be turned away when I try to get a bit closer. Hell, I want to have sex! I guess I'm angry because I keep hoping things going to significantly improve--and they're not. There's just too much to dig through, and honey, therapy is expensive. I might give this til the end of the year and then re-evaluate. A year of therapy seems plenty to me.

So, feeling angry, desperate, bored and quite horny--a dangerous combo!

Add guilty, too, for even posting this. I don't know why I'm in this situation or why it seems so difficult to change. My friends say it's because I really care what happens, that I still care about my partner and our relationship. Makes sense.

But it also feels like I'm waiting for something, something either positive or negative, to happen that will tip the scales one way or the other. Maybe that's what I'm doing wrong. This morning, I pulled a tarot card for a quick meditation: the 7 of Pentacles. I'm still learning tarot, but this seemed to be about taking responsibility for my actions as well as coming to a cross-roads and taking stock. Seems appropriate, no?

Sex, Money & Power Tools!--Reflections on the Latest Shamanic Workshop

Busy week and I'm late on posting about the shamanic workshop 2 weeks ago. I'll have to give you the short-and-sweet version! And here are some pics of our trip to a state park where we worked with elemental energy, the directions and blew our conch shells (very fun!).


This workshop focused on the navel chakra, which is associated with emotions and water. Wrapped up in all this is our perceptions, hang-ups and obsessions over complicated things like money, sex and power.

We talked about how money is simply just energy. Money is actually only worth something because we say it is. In fact, money is not "real." Our dollar bills are no different than shells once traded by Native Americans. But how we view money says much about us. I'm pretty responsible with it, but I guess that's because deep down I'm afraid others will judge what I do with my money. I also try to be generous and not take it too seriously (contradictions?), and that's all connected to family history.


Sex, well, that's an entire blog! Ask yourself: what is the purpose of sex? What are the "rules?" Is it ok to pleasure yourself? What is your earliest sexual memory? What does your religion teach about sex? Is sex outside marriage right or wrong? What about same-sex acts? Yes, I have my own hang-ups, and I'm working on releasing those....

Power is tricky. We all have our own power, whether we believe it or not. But how do you use it? And why do you deny your own power? What makes you feel powerful and why and when? If you were all-powerful/omnipotent, what would you do and why? I typically don't trust my own power and shy away from traditional expressions of power, such as at work or in my relationships. That may not be "bad," but I'd like to know more about why I do what I do. What does it bring me?

And in our workshop, we made some shaman tools or "mana" (spirit) tubes. We capped them with copper, and the idea is that the metal attracts energy while the wood contains it. In one tube we added sand and a quartz crystal. I don't know if I believe all this actually does anything, so I need to keep reading. Supposedly, these tools can tap into the earth's energy and you can direct it or use it. Oooooh--can I zap someone? We were encouraged to add some decorations, so when I get around to that, I'll add some pics to the blog.

Well, that's it. No deep insights this time. Just meditating on what we did and whether I find any of it worthwhile. I forgot to mention that we also experimented with geomancy and divination using metal shapes, stones and pendulums. Mostly it was just fun--and that's a good thing.

Sex, Money & Power Tools!--Reflections on the Latest Shamanic Workshop

Busy week and I'm late on posting about the shamanic workshop 2 weeks ago. I'll have to give you the short-and-sweet version! And here are some pics of our trip to a state park where we worked with elemental energy, the directions and blew our conch shells (very fun!).


This workshop focused on the navel chakra, which is associated with emotions and water. Wrapped up in all this is our perceptions, hang-ups and obsessions over complicated things like money, sex and power.

We talked about how money is simply just energy. Money is actually only worth something because we say it is. In fact, money is not "real." Our dollar bills are no different than shells once traded by Native Americans. But how we view money says much about us. I'm pretty responsible with it, but I guess that's because deep down I'm afraid others will judge what I do with my money. I also try to be generous and not take it too seriously (contradictions?), and that's all connected to family history.


Sex, well, that's an entire blog! Ask yourself: what is the purpose of sex? What are the "rules?" Is it ok to pleasure yourself? What is your earliest sexual memory? What does your religion teach about sex? Is sex outside marriage right or wrong? What about same-sex acts? Yes, I have my own hang-ups, and I'm working on releasing those....

Power is tricky. We all have our own power, whether we believe it or not. But how do you use it? And why do you deny your own power? What makes you feel powerful and why and when? If you were all-powerful/omnipotent, what would you do and why? I typically don't trust my own power and shy away from traditional expressions of power, such as at work or in my relationships. That may not be "bad," but I'd like to know more about why I do what I do. What does it bring me?

And in our workshop, we made some shaman tools or "mana" (spirit) tubes. We capped them with copper, and the idea is that the metal attracts energy while the wood contains it. In one tube we added sand and a quartz crystal. I don't know if I believe all this actually does anything, so I need to keep reading. Supposedly, these tools can tap into the earth's energy and you can direct it or use it. Oooooh--can I zap someone? We were encouraged to add some decorations, so when I get around to that, I'll add some pics to the blog.

Well, that's it. No deep insights this time. Just meditating on what we did and whether I find any of it worthwhile. I forgot to mention that we also experimented with geomancy and divination using metal shapes, stones and pendulums. Mostly it was just fun--and that's a good thing.

Daily Distraction: I have a crush on DNC Chair Howard Dean!

It's the love that dare not speak its name! Sure, call me crazy, but seeing Howard Dean's face on the news last night actually lifted me slightly out of my enduring melancholy. Seriously, I think he's good-looking, handsome, sexy--a silver fox!

Earlier this year, Dean was touring certain critical states to help get out the vote, and I caught him when his bus stopped in my hometown (here are 2 photos I took). He's shorter than I imagined, slimmer--and kinda hot!

Daily Distraction: I have a crush on DNC Chair Howard Dean!

It's the love that dare not speak its name! Sure, call me crazy, but seeing Howard Dean's face on the news last night actually lifted me slightly out of my enduring melancholy. Seriously, I think he's good-looking, handsome, sexy--a silver fox!

Earlier this year, Dean was touring certain critical states to help get out the vote, and I caught him when his bus stopped in my hometown (here are 2 photos I took). He's shorter than I imagined, slimmer--and kinda hot!

Co-Worker Crush

Ever had a crush on a co-worker? Not one of those that turns into marriage but just a good, old-fashioned crush, the kind where you simply go weak when they walk in the room? The kind where they could say anything at all, even talk about waster water management or stamp collecting, and you would still be entranced? Oh yeah, I got one.

First, the intern I had posted about is back in school, so not much eye candy. But a co-worker asked me to help out on a project yesterday. So I did my thing and went to review things with him before heading home. I've worked in the same office with this guy for years, and we pitch in on each other's projects now and then but other than that, I rarely see him--which is a shame because he's totally hot.

He's several years older than me but is in great shape with these beautiful eyes and adorable dimples. Plus, he's a nice guy (and married with 2 kids).

After our review, he then tells me his car is in the shop and asks if I could give him a ride to work the next morning. Are you kidding me?! Hell, I'd probably carry him on my back! Naturally, I said yes without trying to sound too eager. We live near one another, and yes, he does know I'm gay and all that, but obviously he doesn't care, which just makes me like him even more.

So this morning I get all dolled up (kidding!), but anyway I have to admit I'm a tad excited to drive up to his house. His wife (lucky bitch!) waves from the door, and I think to myself: "I have your husband in my truck!" Now, I would never do anything, but damn, thoughts have crossed my mind.

Ok, that's it. No hot sex or anything--don't want to lose my job after all. But all the way to the office, I just listened to him talk about baseball, work--whatever. And I kept thinking how silly it was that I felt so giddy the whole time!

Co-Worker Crush

Ever had a crush on a co-worker? Not one of those that turns into marriage but just a good, old-fashioned crush, the kind where you simply go weak when they walk in the room? The kind where they could say anything at all, even talk about waster water management or stamp collecting, and you would still be entranced? Oh yeah, I got one.

First, the intern I had posted about is back in school, so not much eye candy. But a co-worker asked me to help out on a project yesterday. So I did my thing and went to review things with him before heading home. I've worked in the same office with this guy for years, and we pitch in on each other's projects now and then but other than that, I rarely see him--which is a shame because he's totally hot.

He's several years older than me but is in great shape with these beautiful eyes and adorable dimples. Plus, he's a nice guy (and married with 2 kids).

After our review, he then tells me his car is in the shop and asks if I could give him a ride to work the next morning. Are you kidding me?! Hell, I'd probably carry him on my back! Naturally, I said yes without trying to sound too eager. We live near one another, and yes, he does know I'm gay and all that, but obviously he doesn't care, which just makes me like him even more.

So this morning I get all dolled up (kidding!), but anyway I have to admit I'm a tad excited to drive up to his house. His wife (lucky bitch!) waves from the door, and I think to myself: "I have your husband in my truck!" Now, I would never do anything, but damn, thoughts have crossed my mind.

Ok, that's it. No hot sex or anything--don't want to lose my job after all. But all the way to the office, I just listened to him talk about baseball, work--whatever. And I kept thinking how silly it was that I felt so giddy the whole time!

David Duchovny a Sex Addict

Ok, call me clueless and insensitive, but I'm just not sure about this whole sex addiction thing. Actor David Duchovny has now entered rehab for it. First, I'm just cynical enough to think this is some elaborate marketing gimmick for his show "Californication," in which he plays a sex addict.

Maybe that's no surprise given this older photo (at left), but I always thought it was playful and refreshingly honest. If you like, find a few more sexy pics of Duchovny here.

But doesn't it seems everything is an addiction now or a disorder? Anything we like is an addiction--food, sex, alcohol, drugs, chocolate, relationships, sugar, money, the internet, on and on. At some point, however, doesn't this all cancel out? I mean, if everyone is an addict deep down inside, then doesn't "addict" lose its definition? If everyone is some kind of addict, then that becomes "normal" and it's just who we are. Those who we might call addicts are simply people who have trouble controlling their impulses and desires.

Sure, if sex is ruining Duchovny's life, marriage or whatever, then get some help. But this labeling yourself as an addict--like it's some badge of honor--creeps me out. Can't Duchovny just be a lousy horn dog? That doesn't really change the problem, but I think we have this addiction culture now that practically celebrates your frailties and turns them into an opportunity for yet more attention.

Even if therapy helps, you're always a "recovering addict." It becomes part of you, defines you--is this true healing? If you're always going around thinking about sex or whatever your addiction is and how it defines your life, how can you ever grow up?

Rambling now--but then, I'm a blogging addict. Is there therapy for that?

David Duchovny a Sex Addict

Ok, call me clueless and insensitive, but I'm just not sure about this whole sex addiction thing. Actor David Duchovny has now entered rehab for it. First, I'm just cynical enough to think this is some elaborate marketing gimmick for his show "Californication," in which he plays a sex addict.

Maybe that's no surprise given this older photo (at left), but I always thought it was playful and refreshingly honest. If you like, find a few more sexy pics of Duchovny here.

But doesn't it seems everything is an addiction now or a disorder? Anything we like is an addiction--food, sex, alcohol, drugs, chocolate, relationships, sugar, money, the internet, on and on. At some point, however, doesn't this all cancel out? I mean, if everyone is an addict deep down inside, then doesn't "addict" lose its definition? If everyone is some kind of addict, then that becomes "normal" and it's just who we are. Those who we might call addicts are simply people who have trouble controlling their impulses and desires.

Sure, if sex is ruining Duchovny's life, marriage or whatever, then get some help. But this labeling yourself as an addict--like it's some badge of honor--creeps me out. Can't Duchovny just be a lousy horn dog? That doesn't really change the problem, but I think we have this addiction culture now that practically celebrates your frailties and turns them into an opportunity for yet more attention.

Even if therapy helps, you're always a "recovering addict." It becomes part of you, defines you--is this true healing? If you're always going around thinking about sex or whatever your addiction is and how it defines your life, how can you ever grow up?

Rambling now--but then, I'm a blogging addict. Is there therapy for that?

The Return of the Intern and, Yes, I'm Still a Pig

Over the last few days, I was resigned to the idea that the intern who sat near my office was gone for good and I was kicking myself for not even saying hello. But this morning I headed down to the mail room and ran right into him (!) as he was dropping off mail. I was so surprised (pleasantly!) that I couldn't even speak!

I had promised myself, with all of you as witnesses, that I would be human and say hello to the intern at the next opportunity. So now the pressure was on! So later I headed up to my office but---he wasn't in his cubicle. Ok, well, I had to piss anyway after all that morning coffee, so off to the men's room. I'm at the urinal doing my thing and I hear someone walk in, but they just go to the sinks. I finish, zip up and go to wash my hands, only to run into the intern again as he's heading out the door!

Is the universe trying to tell me something? So back to my office but the intern still isn't at his desk. With a sigh, I sit down to do a few things and then realize I need to put my soda in the breakroom fridge. So off I go, only to walk into the breakroom and right into the intern! Again, he's leaving so it was too awkward to stop and say anything. I laugh to myself about how I keep bumping into this kid.

Well, no time to waste. With the soda chilling, I head to my office--and there's the intern at his desk. Finally. So I walk right up, extend my hand and do the introduction. Aren't you proud?

His name is Dan and he's a rising senior at a local private college. We made the usual small talk, but I couldn't help but think about his thick, tousled blonde hair and scruffy beard! See--what a pig.

Ok, so now what? I am "married" after all. Well, Dan only has 2 weeks left of his internship, so stay tuned!

Oink, oink!

The Return of the Intern and, Yes, I'm Still a Pig

Over the last few days, I was resigned to the idea that the intern who sat near my office was gone for good and I was kicking myself for not even saying hello. But this morning I headed down to the mail room and ran right into him (!) as he was dropping off mail. I was so surprised (pleasantly!) that I couldn't even speak!

I had promised myself, with all of you as witnesses, that I would be human and say hello to the intern at the next opportunity. So now the pressure was on! So later I headed up to my office but---he wasn't in his cubicle. Ok, well, I had to piss anyway after all that morning coffee, so off to the men's room. I'm at the urinal doing my thing and I hear someone walk in, but they just go to the sinks. I finish, zip up and go to wash my hands, only to run into the intern again as he's heading out the door!

Is the universe trying to tell me something? So back to my office but the intern still isn't at his desk. With a sigh, I sit down to do a few things and then realize I need to put my soda in the breakroom fridge. So off I go, only to walk into the breakroom and right into the intern! Again, he's leaving so it was too awkward to stop and say anything. I laugh to myself about how I keep bumping into this kid.

Well, no time to waste. With the soda chilling, I head to my office--and there's the intern at his desk. Finally. So I walk right up, extend my hand and do the introduction. Aren't you proud?

His name is Dan and he's a rising senior at a local private college. We made the usual small talk, but I couldn't help but think about his thick, tousled blonde hair and scruffy beard! See--what a pig.

Ok, so now what? I am "married" after all. Well, Dan only has 2 weeks left of his internship, so stay tuned!

Oink, oink!

O Intern, Where Art Thou?

Looks like the intern I had a secret crush on is gone. His cube has been vacant for a while (no, this isn' the actual cubicle in the photo). However, it does appear a used notepad is on the desk as well as some reference books for editing and fact checking. What? I am so NOT a stalker!

Anyway, I was hoping to at least be human and say "hello" before the internship was up. *sigh*

O Intern, Where Art Thou?

Looks like the intern I had a secret crush on is gone. His cube has been vacant for a while (no, this isn' the actual cubicle in the photo). However, it does appear a used notepad is on the desk as well as some reference books for editing and fact checking. What? I am so NOT a stalker!

Anyway, I was hoping to at least be human and say "hello" before the internship was up. *sigh*