Shaman Snapshot: Russia

I just stumbled on this photo of a shaman in, I believe, the region of Siberia. Now that is some serious shaman drag! The photo was attached to a story about how someone in Russia (back in 2009) was looking to elect a "supreme shaman" by vote in order to help unify various groups and fight against repression. Interesting. Of course, many folks--and shamans--weren't too happy about it.

This story has a little more on the reasoning behind the vote idea and what Russian shamans face in their daily lives. I did look but couldn't find a story on the actual outcome of the vote.

And below is a photo of Russian shaman Filipp Ardeyev.

Shaman Snapshot: Russia

I just stumbled on this photo of a shaman in, I believe, the region of Siberia. Now that is some serious shaman drag! The photo was attached to a story about how someone in Russia (back in 2009) was looking to elect a "supreme shaman" by vote in order to help unify various groups and fight against repression. Interesting. Of course, many folks--and shamans--weren't too happy about it.

This story has a little more on the reasoning behind the vote idea and what Russian shamans face in their daily lives. I did look but couldn't find a story on the actual outcome of the vote.

And below is a photo of Russian shaman Filipp Ardeyev.

Want to Sell Your House Quick for Top Dollar? Hire a Shaman!

Yes, the headline is meant to be sarcastic. I'd like to get your opinion on something, and I suppose it can apply to shamanism or to any spiritual path. In my recent post about shamanic expressions at the Vancouver Olympics, a news story described how a shaman blessed the sleds of the skeleton team. And this bothered me. I wondered, is it "right" or spiritually appropriate to do something like this? I hear about this more and more, individuals who call themselves a shaman offering various blessings on events, homes and objects, with what seems like a specific goal in mind. Does that de-value the practice somehow?

As you may know, I now offer home blessings myself for those who have recently bought a new home. I go in, clear out the old and usher in the new, and work with the family to create the kind of loving environment they truly want. But when a friend suggested that I bless her house to help it sell, I balked. Then someone else suggested I offer my services to local Realtors in order to move houses. My gut said no. So then I hear about this Canadian shaman blessing sleds, which I assuming was to help propel the athletes to Olympic glory.

Now, there isn't anything wrong with winning an Olympic medal or selling a house. But it feels different when I bless a home somehow has just purchased or moved into. My intention is to help them bring to life, to manifest, the kind of home they want--not with things but with love, warmth and safety. But blessing a house so its sells is very specific. What if it takes 1 year to sell instead of 1 month--does that mean the blessing didn't "work?" What if the seller doesn't get their ideal selling price--did it not "work?" When it comes to outcomes like these, people have all kinds of expectations. And I believe strongly that something can "work" even when it turns out completely opposite from how you hoped or intended.

It could be that some of these opportunities are coming my way in order to simply help me work out in my own mind how I feel about these things. Which is good. Part of my problem with some of these requests is that they remind me of some Christians who believe they can pray their way to a great parking spot, an "A" on a test or into the arms of their one true love. That always sickened me. Spirituality--Christian, shaman or whatver--isn't a magic trick. It isn't a switch you flip in order to get something.

I would never say this out loud to anyone who I turned down for a blessing, but it seems to me that their priorities are misplaced. Are they just interested in selling the house for as much money as possible, or do they truly want to tap into the subtle energies present in the home? If a house doesn't sell, I believe shamanism would point us toward personal patience. We might ask questions like: Whose advice about the selling price have I ignored? How can I better present my home so it will sell? Or, is the universe telling me to stay put and not sell? What can be learned from this experience? Shamanism isn't about instant results, but to me it's about sifting through the layers of everyday life for the greater meaning and purpose. Shamanism doesn't "care" whether the house sells or not, but rather it is here to teach us about ourselves and our world.

So maybe I've answered my own questions! Writing does seem to help me sort it out. So--thoughts on the matter anyone?

Want to Sell Your House Quick for Top Dollar? Hire a Shaman!

Yes, the headline is meant to be sarcastic. I'd like to get your opinion on something, and I suppose it can apply to shamanism or to any spiritual path. In my recent post about shamanic expressions at the Vancouver Olympics, a news story described how a shaman blessed the sleds of the skeleton team. And this bothered me. I wondered, is it "right" or spiritually appropriate to do something like this? I hear about this more and more, individuals who call themselves a shaman offering various blessings on events, homes and objects, with what seems like a specific goal in mind. Does that de-value the practice somehow?

As you may know, I now offer home blessings myself for those who have recently bought a new home. I go in, clear out the old and usher in the new, and work with the family to create the kind of loving environment they truly want. But when a friend suggested that I bless her house to help it sell, I balked. Then someone else suggested I offer my services to local Realtors in order to move houses. My gut said no. So then I hear about this Canadian shaman blessing sleds, which I assuming was to help propel the athletes to Olympic glory.

Now, there isn't anything wrong with winning an Olympic medal or selling a house. But it feels different when I bless a home somehow has just purchased or moved into. My intention is to help them bring to life, to manifest, the kind of home they want--not with things but with love, warmth and safety. But blessing a house so its sells is very specific. What if it takes 1 year to sell instead of 1 month--does that mean the blessing didn't "work?" What if the seller doesn't get their ideal selling price--did it not "work?" When it comes to outcomes like these, people have all kinds of expectations. And I believe strongly that something can "work" even when it turns out completely opposite from how you hoped or intended.

It could be that some of these opportunities are coming my way in order to simply help me work out in my own mind how I feel about these things. Which is good. Part of my problem with some of these requests is that they remind me of some Christians who believe they can pray their way to a great parking spot, an "A" on a test or into the arms of their one true love. That always sickened me. Spirituality--Christian, shaman or whatver--isn't a magic trick. It isn't a switch you flip in order to get something.

I would never say this out loud to anyone who I turned down for a blessing, but it seems to me that their priorities are misplaced. Are they just interested in selling the house for as much money as possible, or do they truly want to tap into the subtle energies present in the home? If a house doesn't sell, I believe shamanism would point us toward personal patience. We might ask questions like: Whose advice about the selling price have I ignored? How can I better present my home so it will sell? Or, is the universe telling me to stay put and not sell? What can be learned from this experience? Shamanism isn't about instant results, but to me it's about sifting through the layers of everyday life for the greater meaning and purpose. Shamanism doesn't "care" whether the house sells or not, but rather it is here to teach us about ourselves and our world.

So maybe I've answered my own questions! Writing does seem to help me sort it out. So--thoughts on the matter anyone?

A River Runs Through My Life

 

The creek in Latham Grove, photographed in summer 2009

Funny how we overlook themes or connections--streams, if you will--in our lives. Then they sneak up on us and say, "Duh--hello!" That happened to me this morning on my walk. A large creek runs through Latham Grove, where I live, flowing north through the city until it empties into a larger river outside of town. The creek is one reason why I moved here, but it wasn't until about 30 minutes ago that I remembered an older connection I have to this creek.

It shouldn't be surprising, since I've always been drawn to water. Lakes in my childhood, an ocean and a major river while in college in Florida, the creek in Brandtlund Grove and now here.

My little revelation just hit me out of the blue, as these things do. The creek is part of 2 city parks, and my first connection emerged not quite 20 years ago when I got my first real job here. I had an hour commute since I was living elsewhere, and since I had little money, I would pack my lunch and leave the office to get some air. Just a few blocks away was this park and creek, what I now call Latham Grove. I could park my car and see the creek and lots of green space. I would eat, read and think. Now that I think back, it was a difficult time in my life since I was just coming to terms with being gay. This park--this creek--provided safety and rest along my spiritual journey.

I probably visited the park only for a year, maybe two. Now here I am again. I can walk from my apartment all the way to where I once parked my car to eat, read and think. I can look out my front upstairs window and see this same creek as it makes it way north. Once again it's a place of safety, rest and healing. So I stood by the creek this morning, taking this all in and feeling grateful, so grateful.

A river runs through my life.

With that in mind, here's "River of Love" by Sam Phillips, a favorite from my college days.

A River Runs Through My Life

 

The creek in Latham Grove, photographed in summer 2009

Funny how we overlook themes or connections--streams, if you will--in our lives. Then they sneak up on us and say, "Duh--hello!" That happened to me this morning on my walk. A large creek runs through Latham Grove, where I live, flowing north through the city until it empties into a larger river outside of town. The creek is one reason why I moved here, but it wasn't until about 30 minutes ago that I remembered an older connection I have to this creek.

It shouldn't be surprising, since I've always been drawn to water. Lakes in my childhood, an ocean and a major river while in college in Florida, the creek in Brandtlund Grove and now here.

My little revelation just hit me out of the blue, as these things do. The creek is part of 2 city parks, and my first connection emerged not quite 20 years ago when I got my first real job here. I had an hour commute since I was living elsewhere, and since I had little money, I would pack my lunch and leave the office to get some air. Just a few blocks away was this park and creek, what I now call Latham Grove. I could park my car and see the creek and lots of green space. I would eat, read and think. Now that I think back, it was a difficult time in my life since I was just coming to terms with being gay. This park--this creek--provided safety and rest along my spiritual journey.

I probably visited the park only for a year, maybe two. Now here I am again. I can walk from my apartment all the way to where I once parked my car to eat, read and think. I can look out my front upstairs window and see this same creek as it makes it way north. Once again it's a place of safety, rest and healing. So I stood by the creek this morning, taking this all in and feeling grateful, so grateful.

A river runs through my life.

With that in mind, here's "River of Love" by Sam Phillips, a favorite from my college days.

More Shamanism at Vancouver Olympics

I haven't had time to watch much of the Vancouver Olympics, however, I see that shamanic or pagan images keep popping up. Wonder what that's all about?

Canada's Jon Montgomery (above) just won gold in the skeleton event. If you look at his helmet, it sports a stylized turtle image, in the manner of Canada's native peoples. Montgomery started wearing the helmet (pictured) after a shaman told him that his spirit animal was a turtle! Seems a few people poked fun at Jon--a racer, for wearing an image usually associated with slowness--but now he gets the last laugh. And turtle medicine is actually quite powerful. I became more familiar with it last year.

There was more shamanism evident in the Opening Ceremony: Canada's first peoples dancing and drumming, a spirit bear, mystical trees and salmon, a shaman walking north with his magickal staff, and more. Sia at Full Circle gives a good review of it here.

I don't know how deeply or seriously people are taking all this--but it can only be a good thing. Just the fact that more people are recognizing the importance of native ways, of animal wisdom, of the spirit of a particular place--I believe all of this sticks with us and affects us in ways that will one day amaze and humble us. It's spirit's way of getting our attention and leading us in the way we should go. I had this very experience this morning on my walk, and I'll post about that next.

More Shamanism at Vancouver Olympics

I haven't had time to watch much of the Vancouver Olympics, however, I see that shamanic or pagan images keep popping up. Wonder what that's all about?

Canada's Jon Montgomery (above) just won gold in the skeleton event. If you look at his helmet, it sports a stylized turtle image, in the manner of Canada's native peoples. Montgomery started wearing the helmet (pictured) after a shaman told him that his spirit animal was a turtle! Seems a few people poked fun at Jon--a racer, for wearing an image usually associated with slowness--but now he gets the last laugh. And turtle medicine is actually quite powerful. I became more familiar with it last year.

There was more shamanism evident in the Opening Ceremony: Canada's first peoples dancing and drumming, a spirit bear, mystical trees and salmon, a shaman walking north with his magickal staff, and more. Sia at Full Circle gives a good review of it here.

I don't know how deeply or seriously people are taking all this--but it can only be a good thing. Just the fact that more people are recognizing the importance of native ways, of animal wisdom, of the spirit of a particular place--I believe all of this sticks with us and affects us in ways that will one day amaze and humble us. It's spirit's way of getting our attention and leading us in the way we should go. I had this very experience this morning on my walk, and I'll post about that next.

Galactic Gears in Motion

Have you ever felt energy shift--I mean, literally? Maybe this sounds crazy but I believe we all experience this--we just often ignore it.

We've all "felt" things, circumstances or whatever, click into place as if they were literal pieces of a puzzle? But this is even more than that. It isn't just having a good day. It's more like making a decision and then feeling the effects of that decision trigger giant, celestial gears into turning, as if an entire apparatus is now moving based on one small action, an apparatus that formerly had been poised, still, waiting for you to act.

That's how this week has been. I sense something's changed, something's moving again. It's a little of a relief, and it's a little scary, too, because other options have now been closed off.

What the hell am I talking about? I could write forever on this, but I'm not quite ready. I will say that I've decided to reunite with my partner. There are many reasons why. Mostly I looked at what kind of person I want to be, and I realized that there are many things I can still learn from him. And, ultimately, I love him.

And that decision has set these great gears into motion.

Galactic Gears in Motion

Have you ever felt energy shift--I mean, literally? Maybe this sounds crazy but I believe we all experience this--we just often ignore it.

We've all "felt" things, circumstances or whatever, click into place as if they were literal pieces of a puzzle? But this is even more than that. It isn't just having a good day. It's more like making a decision and then feeling the effects of that decision trigger giant, celestial gears into turning, as if an entire apparatus is now moving based on one small action, an apparatus that formerly had been poised, still, waiting for you to act.

That's how this week has been. I sense something's changed, something's moving again. It's a little of a relief, and it's a little scary, too, because other options have now been closed off.

What the hell am I talking about? I could write forever on this, but I'm not quite ready. I will say that I've decided to reunite with my partner. There are many reasons why. Mostly I looked at what kind of person I want to be, and I realized that there are many things I can still learn from him. And, ultimately, I love him.

And that decision has set these great gears into motion.

The Most Interesting Thing I've Seen All Day

Is, naturally, Lady Gaga. Here she is arriving at the Brit Awards (where she is changing her show to honor the late Alexander McQueen).

Once again, Gaga has inspired me. I love the way she constantly pushes herself to stay creative. I have plans tonight with friends, and so I'm going to step up the fashion just a hair. I mean, these things take planning! I could just throw on jeans--which is what I had in mind--but we'll see what else I can come up with. But baby steps...

Otherwise, work is work. Good news on the romantic front: Things with my partner are going really well, so stay tuned for more updates. We're still in the process of getting the house ready to sell, so bathroom walls are being sanded and primed in preparation for painting.

Busy day, too. I had hopes to carve out 15 minutes or so for a meditation (several things to explore!)--so maybe that will still happen.

Until next time, be good to yourself and love someone today.

The Most Interesting Thing I've Seen All Day

Is, naturally, Lady Gaga. Here she is arriving at the Brit Awards (where she is changing her show to honor the late Alexander McQueen).

Once again, Gaga has inspired me. I love the way she constantly pushes herself to stay creative. I have plans tonight with friends, and so I'm going to step up the fashion just a hair. I mean, these things take planning! I could just throw on jeans--which is what I had in mind--but we'll see what else I can come up with. But baby steps...

Otherwise, work is work. Good news on the romantic front: Things with my partner are going really well, so stay tuned for more updates. We're still in the process of getting the house ready to sell, so bathroom walls are being sanded and primed in preparation for painting.

Busy day, too. I had hopes to carve out 15 minutes or so for a meditation (several things to explore!)--so maybe that will still happen.

Until next time, be good to yourself and love someone today.

You're Blocking My Vibe Reception!

I'm a skeptic about lots of things. Maybe not as strong as some people, but I'm skeptical about more things than some would expect.

For example, when people say things like, "I'm sending you healing energy right now!" It feels exactly like a Christian prayer and, while there isn't anything wrong with that, it's just that I came to feel several years ago that prayer didn't work. And since "sending energy" feels the same, well, I'm skeptical.

But tonight while eating dinner at home, I got to thinking about this. I was seated at my small dining table, and several feet away sits a radio on top of a chest. The radio was on, and I was listening to some NPR news program. But then the signal suddenly faded until it was almost gone completely. I grumbled about the reception but didn't move to do anything. And then I sat back in my chair--and the signal come in loud and strong!

I realized that it was my own body that was interfering with the signal. Now, this may not be any grand revelation--but it got me to thinking. And I experimented. Whenever I would lean forward over my plate, the signal faded. When I sat back, the signal was loud and clear. So just that relatively small movement made a big difference. My body was interfering with the radio waves, interfering with invisible waves carrying sound over great distances and being attacted to my radio. I don't know why or how exactly, but that's obviously what was happening. I just sat there wondering about this in amazement that it was, one, even possible, and wondering about what other sorts of things are happening all around me that I can't see. Does my physical presence or my actions have more of an influence that I am willing to believe?

We all take radio waves for granted, even if we don't know exactly how they work. We can't see them or feel them. Only 1 of our senses is affected (hearing). It got me to thinkin that there's a helluva lot in this world that I don't understand, and there's a helluva lot going on that I can't sense in any tangible way--yet, something's there. What do you think?

You're Blocking My Vibe Reception!

I'm a skeptic about lots of things. Maybe not as strong as some people, but I'm skeptical about more things than some would expect.

For example, when people say things like, "I'm sending you healing energy right now!" It feels exactly like a Christian prayer and, while there isn't anything wrong with that, it's just that I came to feel several years ago that prayer didn't work. And since "sending energy" feels the same, well, I'm skeptical.

But tonight while eating dinner at home, I got to thinking about this. I was seated at my small dining table, and several feet away sits a radio on top of a chest. The radio was on, and I was listening to some NPR news program. But then the signal suddenly faded until it was almost gone completely. I grumbled about the reception but didn't move to do anything. And then I sat back in my chair--and the signal come in loud and strong!

I realized that it was my own body that was interfering with the signal. Now, this may not be any grand revelation--but it got me to thinking. And I experimented. Whenever I would lean forward over my plate, the signal faded. When I sat back, the signal was loud and clear. So just that relatively small movement made a big difference. My body was interfering with the radio waves, interfering with invisible waves carrying sound over great distances and being attacted to my radio. I don't know why or how exactly, but that's obviously what was happening. I just sat there wondering about this in amazement that it was, one, even possible, and wondering about what other sorts of things are happening all around me that I can't see. Does my physical presence or my actions have more of an influence that I am willing to believe?

We all take radio waves for granted, even if we don't know exactly how they work. We can't see them or feel them. Only 1 of our senses is affected (hearing). It got me to thinkin that there's a helluva lot in this world that I don't understand, and there's a helluva lot going on that I can't sense in any tangible way--yet, something's there. What do you think?

If You Stutter, There May Soon Be More H-H-Help

And yes, I can joke about it because I was once an awful stutterer! Braces did seem to help, but I still lapse into a stutter sometimes if I get particularly nervous or excited about something. Seems to be aggravated, too, by how I'm breathing.

Anyway, scientists have now identified genes that may play a role in stuttering. So, no, you can't blame your parents any more.

If You Stutter, There May Soon Be More H-H-Help

And yes, I can joke about it because I was once an awful stutterer! Braces did seem to help, but I still lapse into a stutter sometimes if I get particularly nervous or excited about something. Seems to be aggravated, too, by how I'm breathing.

Anyway, scientists have now identified genes that may play a role in stuttering. So, no, you can't blame your parents any more.

Divination and Romance: Give Me Some Guidance Already!

Since things with my partner are going much better, I've been leaning toward getting back together with  him. Nothing's been decided yet, but I do wonder if that is the "right" decision. Of course, I also believe there really is no "right" decision; it's all in what I want most, what I want for my life. Be that as it may, I was pondering all this the other day and thought a little divination might help.

Unlike some, I don't believe divination provides specific answers. But I do think it can help us clear away the filters we put up in order to see what our deeper desires are, what our subconscious is really saying--and for whatever reason, I feel that is more honest. Still not "right" or "wrong" but simply more honest. No matter the form of divination, your question is always: "How do I feel about _______?"

So I tried a couple of types of divination, to see what answers I would get. No surprise, perhaps, but I kept getting different answers! Some would say this just proves divination is hooey--or it may simply be an indication of the indecision I'm experiencing.

 Stone Casting
First I tried stone casting (a form of geomancy), using 3 stones: one multicolored, one lighter stone and one much darker stone. You hold the stones, ask the question, toss them and then get your "yes" or "no answer based on which stone--the lighter or the darker--has landed closest to the multicolored stone (also called the "teaching stone." So I did this 3 times, each time asking how I felt about getting back together with my partner. I got 1 "yes," 1 "no" and 1 "don't know," when the lighter and darker stones fell an equal distance from the teaching stone. Hmmm, ok, not very helpful!

Picture Casting

This form also uses stones but 7 instead of 3, and they can be any color. Once the stones land (best to toss on floor for this one), you walk around the "picture" they have created in order to see it from all perspectives, all the while trying to determine if anything about the shape stands out. Does it look like something? Are the stones pointing in a specific direction? In my case, the stones fell really close together--and, I kid you not, formed a lowercase "y" shape, which I took to mean "yes!"

Pendulum

I also tried the good ol' pendulum for good measure. You ask the same question, then get your answer based on the pendulum's movement--and, honestly, I always have to look. There's clockwise, counterclockwise, and up and down, but I forget now which is "yes," "no" and "don't know." Regardless, my results after 3 asks were: 2 "yes" and 1 "don't know."

Tarot

Well, I couldn't go without drawing a tarot card, now could I? After shuffling my deck and asking my question, I drew the Five of Cups. Now, the 5 of any suite is positive, regardless of whether it's upside down or not. However, the Five of Cups has to do with disappointment and loss. It could be that you are saying goodbye to someone or something; it could also mean you are simply longing to be reunited; or it may be acknowledging mistakes--none of which are answers per se.

So, the grand total was 4 "Yes," 2 "Don't Know" and 1 "No." Going back to the question--how do I feel about going back to my partner--the majority of the answers would say that I feel positively about this idea. But that doesn't really tell me how things will turn out if I do!

And therein lies my struggle. I can't know, and there isn't any way to find out. I can try divination to get a clue, or I can simply use my own limited wisdom and experience--but nothing will prevent me from taking a risk either way. It's all a gamble, always has been and always will be.

Divination and Romance: Give Me Some Guidance Already!

Since things with my partner are going much better, I've been leaning toward getting back together with  him. Nothing's been decided yet, but I do wonder if that is the "right" decision. Of course, I also believe there really is no "right" decision; it's all in what I want most, what I want for my life. Be that as it may, I was pondering all this the other day and thought a little divination might help.

Unlike some, I don't believe divination provides specific answers. But I do think it can help us clear away the filters we put up in order to see what our deeper desires are, what our subconscious is really saying--and for whatever reason, I feel that is more honest. Still not "right" or "wrong" but simply more honest. No matter the form of divination, your question is always: "How do I feel about _______?"

So I tried a couple of types of divination, to see what answers I would get. No surprise, perhaps, but I kept getting different answers! Some would say this just proves divination is hooey--or it may simply be an indication of the indecision I'm experiencing.

 Stone Casting
First I tried stone casting (a form of geomancy), using 3 stones: one multicolored, one lighter stone and one much darker stone. You hold the stones, ask the question, toss them and then get your "yes" or "no answer based on which stone--the lighter or the darker--has landed closest to the multicolored stone (also called the "teaching stone." So I did this 3 times, each time asking how I felt about getting back together with my partner. I got 1 "yes," 1 "no" and 1 "don't know," when the lighter and darker stones fell an equal distance from the teaching stone. Hmmm, ok, not very helpful!

Picture Casting

This form also uses stones but 7 instead of 3, and they can be any color. Once the stones land (best to toss on floor for this one), you walk around the "picture" they have created in order to see it from all perspectives, all the while trying to determine if anything about the shape stands out. Does it look like something? Are the stones pointing in a specific direction? In my case, the stones fell really close together--and, I kid you not, formed a lowercase "y" shape, which I took to mean "yes!"

Pendulum

I also tried the good ol' pendulum for good measure. You ask the same question, then get your answer based on the pendulum's movement--and, honestly, I always have to look. There's clockwise, counterclockwise, and up and down, but I forget now which is "yes," "no" and "don't know." Regardless, my results after 3 asks were: 2 "yes" and 1 "don't know."

Tarot

Well, I couldn't go without drawing a tarot card, now could I? After shuffling my deck and asking my question, I drew the Five of Cups. Now, the 5 of any suite is positive, regardless of whether it's upside down or not. However, the Five of Cups has to do with disappointment and loss. It could be that you are saying goodbye to someone or something; it could also mean you are simply longing to be reunited; or it may be acknowledging mistakes--none of which are answers per se.

So, the grand total was 4 "Yes," 2 "Don't Know" and 1 "No." Going back to the question--how do I feel about going back to my partner--the majority of the answers would say that I feel positively about this idea. But that doesn't really tell me how things will turn out if I do!

And therein lies my struggle. I can't know, and there isn't any way to find out. I can try divination to get a clue, or I can simply use my own limited wisdom and experience--but nothing will prevent me from taking a risk either way. It's all a gamble, always has been and always will be.

The Surprise Reason Why I'm Glad the New Orleans Saints Won the Super Bowl

It isn't because I like football--hell, I don't even know what they're doing out there on that field! It's kinda because Hurricane Katrina (and the government) pummeled the city 5 years ago--but that isn't it entirely. And it might be partly because Coach Sean Payton is kinda sexy, as far as NFL coaches go (woof!)--but that still isn't it. No, the reason I'm glad is because I can finally hold my head high after buying a New Orleans Saints book bag in 3rd grade and suffering for it!

It was quite tragic, as has been the Saints' overall NFL record. So, back in 3rd grade, all my classmates were excited because we could order book bags showing any of the NFL teams. We could choose whichever team we liked, and the bag would show the team's colors. Unfortunately, I didn't know a damn thing about football. My parents weren't sports fans nor were my brothers--I don't think I'd even seen a game on TV yet. I certainly didn't play myself.

Black and Gold Was SO "In" that Season
So imagine my confusion as I scanned the list of NFL teams, trying to decide which one I should order. I knew what "dolphins" were and "colts" and "cowboys," but what exactly was a "steeler?" And I was totally caving to peer pressure. I had no idea who to choose, but I figured that if everyone else was so excited about ordering these book bags, well, I'd have to order one to be cool, if nothing else. Oh, so sad--it was like an episode of "Ugly Betty" (good intentions but ridicule and tragedy around the corner!).

To make my decision, I did what any budding gay boy would do--I picked the team that had the prettiest colors! (And some nitwits say being gay isn't inborn!) I thought the Saints' black and gold were quite elegant as was the fleur-de-lis (oooh, French--I felt so European!). So I checked that box, had my mom write a check and waited in anticipation with my classmates for the book bags to arrive.

Let the Mocking Begin
Then the day came when the bags arrived and were passed out to us. I vaguely remember thinking my choice would be recognized as quite the tasteful fashion statement. Naturally, everyone had to see which team's book bag you had ordered--and then it began. "You like the SAINTS?!" "The Saints suck!" "Why did you order a Saints bag?" *snort-snicker-ha, ha!*

That's right--I had picked the ONE team that no one else had ordered, that no one else respected. In some way, it was kind of sweet: the misfit NFL book bag for the misfit boy! But I didn't back down so easily. I'll have you know I carried that bag proudly (that black-and-gold fleur-de-lis WAS elegant, you backwoods, hillbilly Philistines!) When I rode the bus and the kids pointed, snickered and laughed at me and my Saints bag, I just ignored them (fortunately, one of the older boys did rescue me once from the taunting--thank you, Scott!).

A Win for that 3rd-Grade Gay Boy!
So last night as the Saints came back from their 10-point deficit to win the Super Bowl in their first-ever appearance, I was there with them--a little 3rd-grader carrying his Saints bag and running down the field toward the end zone! As they lifted the Super Bowl trophy in victory, I imagined myself on that old school bus gripping that book bag in all it's fleur-de-lis elegance and thrusting it into the air in vindication! The Saints had won, and in some small way, so had I! So stick that in your eye.

And what happened to my book bag? Fittingly, perhaps, the end was tragic. Later that school year, I was riding the bus home one day when I became nauseous--and promptly blew chunks all over my beautiful black-and-gold Saints bag! Mom had to throw it away after that. But I've never forgotten it--and I never will!

The Surprise Reason Why I'm Glad the New Orleans Saints Won the Super Bowl

It isn't because I like football--hell, I don't even know what they're doing out there on that field! It's kinda because Hurricane Katrina (and the government) pummeled the city 5 years ago--but that isn't it entirely. And it might be partly because Coach Sean Payton is kinda sexy, as far as NFL coaches go (woof!)--but that still isn't it. No, the reason I'm glad is because I can finally hold my head high after buying a New Orleans Saints book bag in 3rd grade and suffering for it!

It was quite tragic, as has been the Saints' overall NFL record. So, back in 3rd grade, all my classmates were excited because we could order book bags showing any of the NFL teams. We could choose whichever team we liked, and the bag would show the team's colors. Unfortunately, I didn't know a damn thing about football. My parents weren't sports fans nor were my brothers--I don't think I'd even seen a game on TV yet. I certainly didn't play myself.

Black and Gold Was SO "In" that Season
So imagine my confusion as I scanned the list of NFL teams, trying to decide which one I should order. I knew what "dolphins" were and "colts" and "cowboys," but what exactly was a "steeler?" And I was totally caving to peer pressure. I had no idea who to choose, but I figured that if everyone else was so excited about ordering these book bags, well, I'd have to order one to be cool, if nothing else. Oh, so sad--it was like an episode of "Ugly Betty" (good intentions but ridicule and tragedy around the corner!).

To make my decision, I did what any budding gay boy would do--I picked the team that had the prettiest colors! (And some nitwits say being gay isn't inborn!) I thought the Saints' black and gold were quite elegant as was the fleur-de-lis (oooh, French--I felt so European!). So I checked that box, had my mom write a check and waited in anticipation with my classmates for the book bags to arrive.

Let the Mocking Begin
Then the day came when the bags arrived and were passed out to us. I vaguely remember thinking my choice would be recognized as quite the tasteful fashion statement. Naturally, everyone had to see which team's book bag you had ordered--and then it began. "You like the SAINTS?!" "The Saints suck!" "Why did you order a Saints bag?" *snort-snicker-ha, ha!*

That's right--I had picked the ONE team that no one else had ordered, that no one else respected. In some way, it was kind of sweet: the misfit NFL book bag for the misfit boy! But I didn't back down so easily. I'll have you know I carried that bag proudly (that black-and-gold fleur-de-lis WAS elegant, you backwoods, hillbilly Philistines!) When I rode the bus and the kids pointed, snickered and laughed at me and my Saints bag, I just ignored them (fortunately, one of the older boys did rescue me once from the taunting--thank you, Scott!).

A Win for that 3rd-Grade Gay Boy!
So last night as the Saints came back from their 10-point deficit to win the Super Bowl in their first-ever appearance, I was there with them--a little 3rd-grader carrying his Saints bag and running down the field toward the end zone! As they lifted the Super Bowl trophy in victory, I imagined myself on that old school bus gripping that book bag in all it's fleur-de-lis elegance and thrusting it into the air in vindication! The Saints had won, and in some small way, so had I! So stick that in your eye.

And what happened to my book bag? Fittingly, perhaps, the end was tragic. Later that school year, I was riding the bus home one day when I became nauseous--and promptly blew chunks all over my beautiful black-and-gold Saints bag! Mom had to throw it away after that. But I've never forgotten it--and I never will!

A Night of Drumming, the Green Fairy and Fire!

Got together last night with some friends who attended the Shamanic Mystery School with me last year, for "food, fun and fellowship" as the Christians like to say. Except it was a lot more fun and boisterous than any of those Baptist get-togethers I used to frequent.

Bawdy humor, of the shamanic variety, a great venison dish and my first taste of absinthe! I didn't actually see any green fairies (as the drink was once called) but then i only had 1 small glass. But it was tasty--if you like licorice.

Then the 6 of us headed outdoors around the fire for some drumming, and my friend sang a beautiful Native American song. Then we took turns throwing something into the fire that symbolized what we wanted to leave behind (my fear of what others think) and something symbolizing 1 thing we wanted to create this year (a new relationship with my partner). The fire was warm as was the spirit energy in that small circle. Then we headed back inside for a long period of drumming. It's been long overdue!

And so I left feeling refreshed and my perspective--on lots of things--renewed. Now to just hold on to that perspective and try to carry it into the coming week.

Thanks for stopping by!

A Night of Drumming, the Green Fairy and Fire!

Got together last night with some friends who attended the Shamanic Mystery School with me last year, for "food, fun and fellowship" as the Christians like to say. Except it was a lot more fun and boisterous than any of those Baptist get-togethers I used to frequent.

Bawdy humor, of the shamanic variety, a great venison dish and my first taste of absinthe! I didn't actually see any green fairies (as the drink was once called) but then i only had 1 small glass. But it was tasty--if you like licorice.

Then the 6 of us headed outdoors around the fire for some drumming, and my friend sang a beautiful Native American song. Then we took turns throwing something into the fire that symbolized what we wanted to leave behind (my fear of what others think) and something symbolizing 1 thing we wanted to create this year (a new relationship with my partner). The fire was warm as was the spirit energy in that small circle. Then we headed back inside for a long period of drumming. It's been long overdue!

And so I left feeling refreshed and my perspective--on lots of things--renewed. Now to just hold on to that perspective and try to carry it into the coming week.

Thanks for stopping by!

MORE Snow and Ice!

I woke up this morning to a few more inches of snow, and now we have rain/freezing rain! Well, I guess that screws the plans I had tonight to meet friends for dinner and a gallery hop. Things pretty much shut down 'round here when the weather turns bad.

Should I go to my doc appt? I have a routine appointment this morning for some lab work. I may try to call, however, you rarely get through to a real, live human being who can tell you anything, such as whether their office has closed.

And then work. I do have lots to do today, however, the office is open (I checked). Ugh--I so do not want to be out in this mess today!

MORE Snow and Ice!

I woke up this morning to a few more inches of snow, and now we have rain/freezing rain! Well, I guess that screws the plans I had tonight to meet friends for dinner and a gallery hop. Things pretty much shut down 'round here when the weather turns bad.

Should I go to my doc appt? I have a routine appointment this morning for some lab work. I may try to call, however, you rarely get through to a real, live human being who can tell you anything, such as whether their office has closed.

And then work. I do have lots to do today, however, the office is open (I checked). Ugh--I so do not want to be out in this mess today!

Party at My Pad! Wrapping Up My Quest to Join the Illuminati With Final Steps 16-18

Ok, it's almost graduation time, kids, when we get to flip that Illuminati tassle over to the other side! Oh yeah, there will totally be a kegger afterwards (and Illuminati brothers totally have the best party connections). If you've been paying attention, then you know I've been acing this Illuminati application thing. I have a few steps to knock out but mostly, I'm in!

Finally, the last 3 of 18 steps. Drum roll, please!

16) Be judicious with what you tell people.

Hell, I do this already! As I've said before, I don't go around just telling anyone that I'm a shaman. So hiding my Illuminati ambitions will be a piece of cake!

17) Always appear to know more than what you are revealing. 

Ok, I can work on that. Typically, I like to play a little dumb to throw everyone off--but this should be fun. Get 'em worked up and leave 'em wantin' more! 

18) Be patient. You can only join the Illuminati after years of demonstrating your worth. This could take decades. 

Well, my partner has always said that I'm persistent and I never let anything go (hmmmm). And patience? See #1! 

Joining the Illuminati wasn't as difficult as I thought. As membership privileges roll my way, I'll be sure to let you know how I make out and how much power, money, influence I have. Don't be a hater.

Party at My Pad! Wrapping Up My Quest to Join the Illuminati With Final Steps 16-18

Ok, it's almost graduation time, kids, when we get to flip that Illuminati tassle over to the other side! Oh yeah, there will totally be a kegger afterwards (and Illuminati brothers totally have the best party connections). If you've been paying attention, then you know I've been acing this Illuminati application thing. I have a few steps to knock out but mostly, I'm in!

Finally, the last 3 of 18 steps. Drum roll, please!

16) Be judicious with what you tell people.

Hell, I do this already! As I've said before, I don't go around just telling anyone that I'm a shaman. So hiding my Illuminati ambitions will be a piece of cake!

17) Always appear to know more than what you are revealing. 

Ok, I can work on that. Typically, I like to play a little dumb to throw everyone off--but this should be fun. Get 'em worked up and leave 'em wantin' more! 

18) Be patient. You can only join the Illuminati after years of demonstrating your worth. This could take decades. 

Well, my partner has always said that I'm persistent and I never let anything go (hmmmm). And patience? See #1! 

Joining the Illuminati wasn't as difficult as I thought. As membership privileges roll my way, I'll be sure to let you know how I make out and how much power, money, influence I have. Don't be a hater.

Daily Distraction: My Favorite "Twilight" Vamp, Kellan Lutz, Strips to His Skivvies

Calvin Klein has convinced Kellan Lutz (*swoon*) to drop his drawers for a new underwear ad. It's times like this that I know there must be a God!

Daily Distraction: My Favorite "Twilight" Vamp, Kellan Lutz, Strips to His Skivvies

Calvin Klein has convinced Kellan Lutz (*swoon*) to drop his drawers for a new underwear ad. It's times like this that I know there must be a God!

If You're Healthy and Reading This, Thank Henrietta Lacks

Hmmm, I bet some racists won't like this news ("You mean some black woman's cells were in that vaccine you gave to my lily-white Aryan child?!"). Yes, and it's keeping your useless ass alive, but Lord only knows why.

Fascinating, however, how Henrietta Lacks' cells have never died. I read about this a few years ago in graduate school, but we didn't get into the actual person's name or her background. Personally, I think it's really cool--and appropriate, in a cosmic-justice sort of way--that a poor, African-American woman has had such a positive, life-affirming effect on millions of people around the world. Not that it should surprise us--just that it's all happened without anyone really knowing about it.

Of course, some will see government conspiracy or even further evidence of racism since Henrietta's cells were taken from a tumor without her knowledge. But she might have a bigger heart than all of us and simply think it's a great achievement.

Naturally, some of her relatives think that, because her cells have never died, Henrietta has some special connection to or purpose from the Almighty! I can hang with that. Thanks, Henrietta.

Here's more about "The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks"--which I totally have to buy.

If You're Healthy and Reading This, Thank Henrietta Lacks

Hmmm, I bet some racists won't like this news ("You mean some black woman's cells were in that vaccine you gave to my lily-white Aryan child?!"). Yes, and it's keeping your useless ass alive, but Lord only knows why.

Fascinating, however, how Henrietta Lacks' cells have never died. I read about this a few years ago in graduate school, but we didn't get into the actual person's name or her background. Personally, I think it's really cool--and appropriate, in a cosmic-justice sort of way--that a poor, African-American woman has had such a positive, life-affirming effect on millions of people around the world. Not that it should surprise us--just that it's all happened without anyone really knowing about it.

Of course, some will see government conspiracy or even further evidence of racism since Henrietta's cells were taken from a tumor without her knowledge. But she might have a bigger heart than all of us and simply think it's a great achievement.

Naturally, some of her relatives think that, because her cells have never died, Henrietta has some special connection to or purpose from the Almighty! I can hang with that. Thanks, Henrietta.

Here's more about "The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks"--which I totally have to buy.

"Gaga" for Lady Gaga's Grammy Gown?

If you saw the Grammys, I'm sure you had an opinion! So what DO you think of Lady Gaga's custom Giorgio Armani gown? Please vote in my poll in sidebar at right!

"Gaga" for Lady Gaga's Grammy Gown?

If you saw the Grammys, I'm sure you had an opinion! So what DO you think of Lady Gaga's custom Giorgio Armani gown? Please vote in my poll in sidebar at right!

Looking Toward Spring: Imbolc 2010

Took this pic of the icicles out my window over the weekend. We got around 8 inches of snow, which is quite a lot for the area. And these icicles grew even longer as the temps varied, turning into long, pointy ice daggers by end of day.

Had my 2010 Imbolc celebration yesterday, here at the midpoint between winter and spring. Much to my surprise, my partner joined in (he really is trying to salvage our relationship, which makes my ol' Grinchy heart grow a size larger). I was also surprised that, earlier in the day, he got to work cleaning the house! That-never-happens. Well, what a perfect transition into Imbolc, a time when some symbolically purified their homes by doing an early spring cleaning.

So my partner and I gathered 'round the dining room table, where I set up my altar (pictured below). After clearing the space and lighting the candles, I handed out 2 seeds/nuts (I think they're hazelnuts--not sure. It was all we had, and my partner had collected them ages ago. Hmmm, maybe he's a closet shaman and doesn't know it yet...). Another Imbolc tradition is to have a feast to celebrate the pending return of nature's abundance, so we chowed down for lunch--which included cheese; dairy products have a connection to Imbolc because it's supposedly near the time when lambs begin nursing.

Also on the altar is my white "power wand" to symbolize St. Brighid, a holly twig to symbolize spring (everything else was under 8 inches of snow!) and some books of poetry, since Brighid was Christianized into the patroness of poets. After we finished eating, we each read a poem, then held the seeds as we talked about what we hoped would grow in 2010. I mentioned my spiritual practice as well as more physical exercise. And my partner said he would keep doing whatever was necessary to keep our relationship intact.

It was a beautiful, wintry weekend, very reflective, which is 1 reason I enjoy this time of year. As to the relationship status, I'm pondering all this over. Much to sort out still, so stay tuned.

 Blessings!

Looking Toward Spring: Imbolc 2010

Took this pic of the icicles out my window over the weekend. We got around 8 inches of snow, which is quite a lot for the area. And these icicles grew even longer as the temps varied, turning into long, pointy ice daggers by end of day.

Had my 2010 Imbolc celebration yesterday, here at the midpoint between winter and spring. Much to my surprise, my partner joined in (he really is trying to salvage our relationship, which makes my ol' Grinchy heart grow a size larger). I was also surprised that, earlier in the day, he got to work cleaning the house! That-never-happens. Well, what a perfect transition into Imbolc, a time when some symbolically purified their homes by doing an early spring cleaning.

So my partner and I gathered 'round the dining room table, where I set up my altar (pictured below). After clearing the space and lighting the candles, I handed out 2 seeds/nuts (I think they're hazelnuts--not sure. It was all we had, and my partner had collected them ages ago. Hmmm, maybe he's a closet shaman and doesn't know it yet...). Another Imbolc tradition is to have a feast to celebrate the pending return of nature's abundance, so we chowed down for lunch--which included cheese; dairy products have a connection to Imbolc because it's supposedly near the time when lambs begin nursing.

Also on the altar is my white "power wand" to symbolize St. Brighid, a holly twig to symbolize spring (everything else was under 8 inches of snow!) and some books of poetry, since Brighid was Christianized into the patroness of poets. After we finished eating, we each read a poem, then held the seeds as we talked about what we hoped would grow in 2010. I mentioned my spiritual practice as well as more physical exercise. And my partner said he would keep doing whatever was necessary to keep our relationship intact.

It was a beautiful, wintry weekend, very reflective, which is 1 reason I enjoy this time of year. As to the relationship status, I'm pondering all this over. Much to sort out still, so stay tuned.

 Blessings!