Miss California's Mom is a Lesbian!

Just when you thought gay-hater Carrie Prejean might fade away, now comes the bombshell that her own mother is a lesbian! Or at least bisexual--although the relationship with the girlfriend seems to have suddenly ended because Carrie's mom didn't think the family could handle it. Which means, "she's just not that into you." Cause no matter your sexual orientation, if you're in love--you're in love.

Not sure if Carrie knew about this, but it does fill in the blanks about Carrie's home situation. Her own parents are divorced. And as a child of divorce myself, there's a part of me that supports traditional marriage and wants it all the last forever like it always does in Disney movies.

But then it gets interesting. When Carrie's parents divorced, they both accused the other of being gay! How crazy is that? My parents just screamed, yelled, cried and threw things. Ahhhhh--good ol' traditional American divorce!

Hmmm, is that odd, queasy sensation I suddenly feel, is that sympathy for Carrie? Maybe. If her parents' divorce was so traumatic and involved allegations of homosexuality, I could understand how that experience could scar you. Maybe even turn you against gay people.

And then I hear that Carrie thinks Satan tempted her when she was asked that fateful question about gay marriage in the Miss USA pageant. And once again, she refuses to take responsibility for her own beliefs and actions! Well, Carrie should certainly understand temptation, considering all those sexy photo shoots she's had. Just think about all those happily married men out being tempted right now by Carrie's almost-exposed boobies. And don't forget the lesbians, too! Poor Carrie, she's so wrapped up in a whirlwind of contradictions, she couldn't find her way out if she tried.

Miss California's Mom is a Lesbian!

Just when you thought gay-hater Carrie Prejean might fade away, now comes the bombshell that her own mother is a lesbian! Or at least bisexual--although the relationship with the girlfriend seems to have suddenly ended because Carrie's mom didn't think the family could handle it. Which means, "she's just not that into you." Cause no matter your sexual orientation, if you're in love--you're in love.

Not sure if Carrie knew about this, but it does fill in the blanks about Carrie's home situation. Her own parents are divorced. And as a child of divorce myself, there's a part of me that supports traditional marriage and wants it all the last forever like it always does in Disney movies.

But then it gets interesting. When Carrie's parents divorced, they both accused the other of being gay! How crazy is that? My parents just screamed, yelled, cried and threw things. Ahhhhh--good ol' traditional American divorce!

Hmmm, is that odd, queasy sensation I suddenly feel, is that sympathy for Carrie? Maybe. If her parents' divorce was so traumatic and involved allegations of homosexuality, I could understand how that experience could scar you. Maybe even turn you against gay people.

And then I hear that Carrie thinks Satan tempted her when she was asked that fateful question about gay marriage in the Miss USA pageant. And once again, she refuses to take responsibility for her own beliefs and actions! Well, Carrie should certainly understand temptation, considering all those sexy photo shoots she's had. Just think about all those happily married men out being tempted right now by Carrie's almost-exposed boobies. And don't forget the lesbians, too! Poor Carrie, she's so wrapped up in a whirlwind of contradictions, she couldn't find her way out if she tried.

Trump Lets Miss California Keep Her Sash--and Steps in a Big Pile of Irony

Despite all the accusations that Miss California--poster-girl for all that's good and true in America--has been shirking her pageant duties and violating her contract by posing for sexy pics, Carrie Prejean gets to keep her title. I guess that includes wearing the California Crown Jewels and overseeing the Changing of the Guard in Sacramento??

Anyway, I'm crestfallen! Well, not really, but I was hoping for the frenzy over this to get whipped a little more. I don't care if she posed semi-nude or whatever--but now, Prejean will use this an example that she, somehow, has been "vindicated" for her willingness never compromise her beliefs. No--matter--what. Because that's what you do--never compromise, even when you're wrong!

Speaking of being wrong--Trump brushed aside the concerns over Prejean's sexy pics by saying that she's a model and this is the 21st century. In other words, "Get over it, you prudes!" And he has a point:

It's the 21st century--so get over gay marriage, you prudes!

Hopefully, this will fade away now, and Miss California can join the growing list of wanna-be reality TV stars and speakers on the church social circuit (but it was fun, wasn't it?!).

Trump Lets Miss California Keep Her Sash--and Steps in a Big Pile of Irony

Despite all the accusations that Miss California--poster-girl for all that's good and true in America--has been shirking her pageant duties and violating her contract by posing for sexy pics, Carrie Prejean gets to keep her title. I guess that includes wearing the California Crown Jewels and overseeing the Changing of the Guard in Sacramento??

Anyway, I'm crestfallen! Well, not really, but I was hoping for the frenzy over this to get whipped a little more. I don't care if she posed semi-nude or whatever--but now, Prejean will use this an example that she, somehow, has been "vindicated" for her willingness never compromise her beliefs. No--matter--what. Because that's what you do--never compromise, even when you're wrong!

Speaking of being wrong--Trump brushed aside the concerns over Prejean's sexy pics by saying that she's a model and this is the 21st century. In other words, "Get over it, you prudes!" And he has a point:

It's the 21st century--so get over gay marriage, you prudes!

Hopefully, this will fade away now, and Miss California can join the growing list of wanna-be reality TV stars and speakers on the church social circuit (but it was fun, wasn't it?!).

Now Miss California Has Topless Photos?!

This is simply too delicious to be true! Or is it? On one hand, I’m not really surprised if she has been photographed topless. Not that I even have a problem with that—but if you’re going to be Miss Holier-Than-Thou and go around judging others, you better make sure your own life is purer than Jesus himself!

Watch the video (thanks, Joe My God)—sounds like this is all backfiring on Prejean. And she was 17 when the naughty photos were taken—isn’t that considered child porn or something??

Now Miss California Has Topless Photos?!

This is simply too delicious to be true! Or is it? On one hand, I’m not really surprised if she has been photographed topless. Not that I even have a problem with that—but if you’re going to be Miss Holier-Than-Thou and go around judging others, you better make sure your own life is purer than Jesus himself!

Watch the video (thanks, Joe My God)—sounds like this is all backfiring on Prejean. And she was 17 when the naughty photos were taken—isn’t that considered child porn or something??

Miss USA Cat Fight! Plus, Boob Jobs and Transsexuals!

This is gettin' good! Now that Miss USA loser, er--first runner-up--Carrie Prejean has become a spokesperson for the anti-gay National Organization for Marriage (NOM), the sequined gloves are coming off! Or at least the media is positioning it that way.

Turns out that Prejean has--*gasp*--had a boob job! And the Miss California pageant paid for the procedure--according to former Miss USA Shanna Moakler, who is also co-executive director for the Miss California pageant as well as a budding reality TV star and a former Playboy model. Not that any of this really matters, but it's refreshing to know that Prejean's beauty is as manufactured as her opinions about gay marriage. Moakler, to her credit, has been taking the high road in most of this, but she was honest when a reporter asked if the Miss California organization had paid to plump up Prejean.

Come on, Carrie--if Jesus had meant for you to have boobs, he would've given you some. Therefore, I believe your boob job is against God's will! No offense to anyone, but I think we need to protect traditional boobs. It's just how I was raised.

I saw Carrie on the Today show this morning, and she's thrown herself into supporting NOM. Poor Matt Lauer couldn't get anything intelligent or even controversial out of Prejean. Seriously, the girl couldn't even defend her support of this organization or its political stance against gay marriage. Sad, really.

And there's more! Photos have surfaced of Prejean getting all smiley with well-known transsexual Amanda Lepore! (That's Amanda on the left.) Now, I know one photo doesn't necessarily mean anything, but Miss-Holier-Than-Thou really ought to think about who she's photographed with if she wants to become the poster child for a political cause. Carrie looks awfully comfortable hanging out with a transsexual, don't you think?

I love it when politics gets surreal. I can eat this stuff for breakfast!

Miss USA Cat Fight! Plus, Boob Jobs and Transsexuals!

This is gettin' good! Now that Miss USA loser, er--first runner-up--Carrie Prejean has become a spokesperson for the anti-gay National Organization for Marriage (NOM), the sequined gloves are coming off! Or at least the media is positioning it that way.

Turns out that Prejean has--*gasp*--had a boob job! And the Miss California pageant paid for the procedure--according to former Miss USA Shanna Moakler, who is also co-executive director for the Miss California pageant as well as a budding reality TV star and a former Playboy model. Not that any of this really matters, but it's refreshing to know that Prejean's beauty is as manufactured as her opinions about gay marriage. Moakler, to her credit, has been taking the high road in most of this, but she was honest when a reporter asked if the Miss California organization had paid to plump up Prejean.

Come on, Carrie--if Jesus had meant for you to have boobs, he would've given you some. Therefore, I believe your boob job is against God's will! No offense to anyone, but I think we need to protect traditional boobs. It's just how I was raised.

I saw Carrie on the Today show this morning, and she's thrown herself into supporting NOM. Poor Matt Lauer couldn't get anything intelligent or even controversial out of Prejean. Seriously, the girl couldn't even defend her support of this organization or its political stance against gay marriage. Sad, really.

And there's more! Photos have surfaced of Prejean getting all smiley with well-known transsexual Amanda Lepore! (That's Amanda on the left.) Now, I know one photo doesn't necessarily mean anything, but Miss-Holier-Than-Thou really ought to think about who she's photographed with if she wants to become the poster child for a political cause. Carrie looks awfully comfortable hanging out with a transsexual, don't you think?

I love it when politics gets surreal. I can eat this stuff for breakfast!

Miss California Is the New Conservative Poster Girl---and They Can Have Her!

Because apparently, conservatives only like busty blondes who can't put an intelligent answer together when asked a question. I didn't see the Miss USA pageant, but everyone's talking about how Miss California's answer to a question about gay marriage may have cost her the crown; she placed as first runner-up. Despite the fact that Carrie Prejean's answer made no sense, conservatives are hailing her as some kind of symbol of good ol' American values. I suppose so, if your values are fumbling the facts, parochialism and blatant bigotry.

As a reward for her mediocrity and intolerance, Prejean has appeared on Fox News and other networks, been praised by state legislators and is receiving accolades from various conservative/Christian bloggers and activists. Next thing you know, this chick will replace Elisabeth Hasselbeck on "The View" because Liz is "too liberal!"

So let's dissect, shall we? I'll go line by line, with her answer and my critique.

Miss C: "We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or the opposite."
Me: No we don't, sweetie. Right now, only 4 out of 50 states recognize same-sex marriage or civil unions between homosexuals. Your home state of California currently does not, so what "land" do you mean exactly? Are you secretly Canadian, perhaps?

Miss C: "And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman."
Me: Well, you know what, that's sweet. But this is also MY country, and I have beliefs, too. But beliefs can be many things. Some people in this diverse country of ours believe that a woman who prances around stage in revealing clothes like you do is a whore and will go to hell. Others believe that women belong in the home raising children. Still others believe women should be submissive to men in all areas of life. That's the family I was raised in, but unlike you, I can see where my family and my raisin' were wrong.

Miss C: "No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised."
Me: Well, that makes it all ok! No offense to black people then, because you see, I was raised to think black people are all unintelligent criminals. I was raised to think the same about everyone who isn't white, actually. Which means Obama really shouldn't be President, you know, because he's biracial, which is almost worse than full-blooded black, cause that means some white woman forgot how she was raised. No, that's a crutch, missy. Real leaders and role models don't parrot the beliefs of their families. They think about issues and form their own opinions.

Well, that's it--that's Miss California's stunning defense of heterosexual marriage! She should write a book! Why isn't she running for public office?! Just what we need--another Sarah Palin!

Seriously, what is it with conservative women and their inability to speak coherently on political topics?

And for the record, Miss Cali, should you try any more pageants, remember this: Us queers love us some beauty queens, but we'll turn on you in a hot, damn minute if you burn us! (Anita Bryant anyone?)

Miss California Is the New Conservative Poster Girl---and They Can Have Her!

Because apparently, conservatives only like busty blondes who can't put an intelligent answer together when asked a question. I didn't see the Miss USA pageant, but everyone's talking about how Miss California's answer to a question about gay marriage may have cost her the crown; she placed as first runner-up. Despite the fact that Carrie Prejean's answer made no sense, conservatives are hailing her as some kind of symbol of good ol' American values. I suppose so, if your values are fumbling the facts, parochialism and blatant bigotry.

As a reward for her mediocrity and intolerance, Prejean has appeared on Fox News and other networks, been praised by state legislators and is receiving accolades from various conservative/Christian bloggers and activists. Next thing you know, this chick will replace Elisabeth Hasselbeck on "The View" because Liz is "too liberal!"

So let's dissect, shall we? I'll go line by line, with her answer and my critique.

Miss C: "We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or the opposite."
Me: No we don't, sweetie. Right now, only 4 out of 50 states recognize same-sex marriage or civil unions between homosexuals. Your home state of California currently does not, so what "land" do you mean exactly? Are you secretly Canadian, perhaps?

Miss C: "And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman."
Me: Well, you know what, that's sweet. But this is also MY country, and I have beliefs, too. But beliefs can be many things. Some people in this diverse country of ours believe that a woman who prances around stage in revealing clothes like you do is a whore and will go to hell. Others believe that women belong in the home raising children. Still others believe women should be submissive to men in all areas of life. That's the family I was raised in, but unlike you, I can see where my family and my raisin' were wrong.

Miss C: "No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised."
Me: Well, that makes it all ok! No offense to black people then, because you see, I was raised to think black people are all unintelligent criminals. I was raised to think the same about everyone who isn't white, actually. Which means Obama really shouldn't be President, you know, because he's biracial, which is almost worse than full-blooded black, cause that means some white woman forgot how she was raised. No, that's a crutch, missy. Real leaders and role models don't parrot the beliefs of their families. They think about issues and form their own opinions.

Well, that's it--that's Miss California's stunning defense of heterosexual marriage! She should write a book! Why isn't she running for public office?! Just what we need--another Sarah Palin!

Seriously, what is it with conservative women and their inability to speak coherently on political topics?

And for the record, Miss Cali, should you try any more pageants, remember this: Us queers love us some beauty queens, but we'll turn on you in a hot, damn minute if you burn us! (Anita Bryant anyone?)