Last Night's Dream: I Caused the Lindsay/Samantha Break-Up!

I'm sure I have more important things to worry about, like the crisis in Gaza, but apparently, my subconscious has other plans.

So last night, I had this crazy dream about how I was dating Lindsay Lohan and hiding drugs for her girlfriend Sam. I kid you not (does Sam do drugs? I have no idea. It was a dream, people!) Normally, you don't put much stock in the power of dreams, right? And then I see this news!

Whoa, I never intended to break them up! Because in my dream, even though I was dating Lindsay, I knew she was still with Samantha, and Samantha was cool with Linds and I being together. Polyamory is very trendy these days.

I guess after that beach picnic the 3 of us had, everything went sour. I should've known something was up. Lindsay acted like she was cool with all, but no. I had bought a gift for Sam but not for her! Lindsay is such the attention whore.

Anyways, she played it off. But then at the Chick-Fil-A, I realized I was still holding onto the crack that Samantha had bought for herself (does she not have pockets?). I had to keep this from Lindsay because--I guess she would want the crack for herself? As we walked out the door, I tried to slip the crack to Sam but dropped it on the floor.

Then there was some dream interlude about comic books and my mother--and then I'm outside driving away with Lindsay while Sam is on her knees in Chick-Fil-A still searching the floor for the crack!

See--their break-up is all my fault! Or maybe it was the cough medicine I had.....

Last Night's Dream: I Caused the Lindsay/Samantha Break-Up!

I'm sure I have more important things to worry about, like the crisis in Gaza, but apparently, my subconscious has other plans.

So last night, I had this crazy dream about how I was dating Lindsay Lohan and hiding drugs for her girlfriend Sam. I kid you not (does Sam do drugs? I have no idea. It was a dream, people!) Normally, you don't put much stock in the power of dreams, right? And then I see this news!

Whoa, I never intended to break them up! Because in my dream, even though I was dating Lindsay, I knew she was still with Samantha, and Samantha was cool with Linds and I being together. Polyamory is very trendy these days.

I guess after that beach picnic the 3 of us had, everything went sour. I should've known something was up. Lindsay acted like she was cool with all, but no. I had bought a gift for Sam but not for her! Lindsay is such the attention whore.

Anyways, she played it off. But then at the Chick-Fil-A, I realized I was still holding onto the crack that Samantha had bought for herself (does she not have pockets?). I had to keep this from Lindsay because--I guess she would want the crack for herself? As we walked out the door, I tried to slip the crack to Sam but dropped it on the floor.

Then there was some dream interlude about comic books and my mother--and then I'm outside driving away with Lindsay while Sam is on her knees in Chick-Fil-A still searching the floor for the crack!

See--their break-up is all my fault! Or maybe it was the cough medicine I had.....

"Gay" Remark Inspires Lindsay Lohan to Leave Acting and Become Hermit

No, not really, but it's hilarious that troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan--not one known for discretion--is suddenly deciding her personal life is off limits. Actually I don't know what she's so touchy about. The "gay" remark, IMHO, was a compliment.

Lindsay's reportedly upset that the LA police chief called her "gay," despite the fact that she's been all but having sex in public with gal pal Samantha Ronson. He was referring to the decrease in papparazzi since Lindsay and her BFFs Paris and Britney have toned down their partying. I don't know if Lezzie--er, Lindsay--is really a lesbian, but the implication is that she has gone gay and that has been a good thing for her.

What's wrong with that? Sure, maybe the police chief was a bit flip, but I agree with him. Lindsay finally found the right woman who could tame her ass! It could've been the other way 'round: "Former Disney actress turns gay and goes bonkers!"

Lindsay's used to controlling her press, but I think the chief touched a nerve here. Relax, Lindsay, we're all a tad touchy when we first come out of the closet. Now, are you and Samantha registered at Target?

"Gay" Remark Inspires Lindsay Lohan to Leave Acting and Become Hermit

No, not really, but it's hilarious that troubled starlet Lindsay Lohan--not one known for discretion--is suddenly deciding her personal life is off limits. Actually I don't know what she's so touchy about. The "gay" remark, IMHO, was a compliment.

Lindsay's reportedly upset that the LA police chief called her "gay," despite the fact that she's been all but having sex in public with gal pal Samantha Ronson. He was referring to the decrease in papparazzi since Lindsay and her BFFs Paris and Britney have toned down their partying. I don't know if Lezzie--er, Lindsay--is really a lesbian, but the implication is that she has gone gay and that has been a good thing for her.

What's wrong with that? Sure, maybe the police chief was a bit flip, but I agree with him. Lindsay finally found the right woman who could tame her ass! It could've been the other way 'round: "Former Disney actress turns gay and goes bonkers!"

Lindsay's used to controlling her press, but I think the chief touched a nerve here. Relax, Lindsay, we're all a tad touchy when we first come out of the closet. Now, are you and Samantha registered at Target?