So, dear readers, are you on Facebook yet? I resisted for a while but then fell head-long into the great, yawning black hole of delights that it is. It really is fun. Sometimes.
No, you won't find Riverwolf on there by name, but I'm signed up under one of my other incarnations. I quickly stumbled upon lots of people from high school and college. It's been great to catch up with people with whom I had lost touch--as well as those I really haven't thought about in 20-some years. It's also been puzzling and frightening!
Puzzling and frightening because most of the people I've reconnected with don't appear to have changed much at all--and yet, I'm quite a different person than I was then. They're still devout, conservative Christians who want to convert you to their way of thinking. Me? Well, I've obviously moved on. I'm quite happy that I've moved on--but what has made the difference? Can anyone explain that?
Why is that I've changed so much--openly gay, new tastes in music and culture, a completely different outlook and philosophy on life--and they appear to have changed so little? I suppose it doesn't matter in the end, but I can't help but wonder if, well, I've somehow stumbled along the way. That's what they would say, anyhow, in their concerned Christian way.
Most troubling is that one woman in particular spouts off on her Facebook page about her opposition to gay marriage. I'm very circumspect on my page, however, revealing little except that I do have a partner. If she wants to find out I'm gay, it's all there. So where does this leave me? I have no desire to try to get her to see things my way. Sure, maybe it's an opportunity for her to learn something--if she opens her mind.
Anyway, maybe all this is the universe's way of helping me integrate all the disparate elements of my life into one cohesive whole. Even though I've moved on, so to speak, I'll admit that I find myself at times being a little self-righteous about it all. And isn't that a quality that I've outgrown? Obviously not.
Guess I've got a little ways to go still, and that's ok. I know some "experts" like to denigrate Facebook, but I disagree. Even if it didn't exist, certain people would still be bullied and obsessing about what everyone thinks of them. Facebook is just the latest tool. But it can also be a useful mirror, a way to get an overview of your own life (for those of us old enough), to see how far you've come and how far you still have to go.
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